Monday, December 04, 2006

A Busy Little Vote Rigger


Blue mountain music to vote by

I know it's a bit far away from Hackney, both geographically and politically, but the State of Missouri seems to have set a new world record that will be of interest to those concerned with more parochial election fraud.

According to The Kansas City Star, the former mayor of the tiny coal town of Appalachia, Ben Cooper, pleaded guilty last Thursday to no fewer than 243 felonies, many of which involved vote-rigging.

County Circuit Judge Tammy McElyea was told that Cooper masterminded a scheme to buy votes with beer, cigarettes and even pork rinds and that he stole election records, forged ballots, hindered the rights of citizens to vote freely and voted more than once himself, including casting a number of absentee votes.

By the time the 11th charge was being read, the defendent was responding "guilty" so quickly that the judge was forced to interject: "You're getting ahead of me", to which the defendent apologised.


I've got a party pack of Fosters, 200 Silk Cut and a few bags of pork scratchings knocking around the house somewhere. Now how many votes could I...?